“Sometimes the hardest part isn’t the silence from them. It’s the silence inside yourself.”
I’ve sat with countless people who whisper some version of this through tears:
“I don’t even know who I am anymore.”
When someone you love pulls away or asks for space, especially without warning, it can knock you off your center.
And I mean all the way off.
Your brain starts looping.
Your appetite vanishes.
Your sense of self? Feels like it evaporates overnight.
And if you’re anything like the people I work with, you’ve probably been Googling things like “how long should I give them” or “what to say when your partner needs space” or “are we still together or not?”
But what if the better question is:
How am I doing in this space?
And what is this doing to me?
This Week, I’m Inviting You to Look in the Mirror
In our latest episode of Love Shack Live, we introduced something we’ve quietly been working on for months, a brand new website and a quiz designed to help you understand how you’re showing up emotionally during this in-between phase of your relationship.
It’s called the Relationship Space Survival Quiz and honestly? It’s more than a quiz. It’s a tool for clarity.
Because when you’re in emotional survival mode, you don’t need advice that tells you to “just communicate” or “focus on yourself.”
You need someone to help you name what’s actually happening inside of you, and why.
You’re Not Just Struggling… You’re Surviving
This quiz doesn’t label you. It reflects a pattern. One that makes perfect sense based on your history, your nervous system, and how you’re wired for connection.
You might see yourself in one of these four archetypes:
The Overfunctioner
You’re doing all the things, fixing, managing, explaining, trying to hold everything (and everyone) together. You’re exhausted and still wondering if it’s enough.
The Ghost of Yourself
You go quiet. You disappear. Not because you don’t care, but because you care so much that the only way to survive is to shrink.
The Emotional Ping-Pong Ball
You ricochet between panic and numbness, overthinking and silence, texting then regretting it, all while walking on eggshells with yourself.
The Frozen Watcher
You’re paralyzed. You don’t want to say or do the wrong thing, so you end up doing nothing, watching, waiting, hoping, but stuck.
This Isn’t Your Forever. But It Is Where You Are Right Now.
That’s where the real work begins.
Because this space? It’s not just about them.
It’s about how you’ve learned to survive.
That’s why I teach emotional weightlifting.
Not as a catchphrase, but as a practice.
It’s about catching yourself in the spiral, pausing to breathe, asking a better question, then making a move that aligns with the person you want to be, not the one stuck in panic or people-pleasing.
Need Support While You Find Your Ground? I Built Something for That.
After you take the quiz, you’ll start getting a series of emails from me that go deeper into your specific survival pattern.
And if you’re ready for more structured support, I want you to know this:
📍 The next round of the Love in Limbo: 30-Day Roadmap starts August 17.
📍 Enrollment closes August 21.
📍 We only have 75 spots, and it’s the last guided round we’re offering in 2025.
If the quiz feels like a mirror…
The Roadmap is the guided path back to yourself.
Here’s What You Can Do Next
🎯 Take the quiz → stacibartley.com/space-quiz
📘 Learn more about the Roadmap → stacibartley.com/30-day-roadmap
You don’t have to figure this out alone anymore.
Let’s start with naming what’s real.
Then we’ll work on changing what’s possible.
